Sunday, February 3, 2013

Another Year Older

Sometimes you just gotta take a break from it all and relax.  That's what I've been enjoying the past few weeks while on vacation from school.  There's been plenty of time for sleep--which I desperately needed to finally kick this cold I've had for weeks.  And also time for reading and catching up on all the TV shows from home I'd fallen behind on over the past few months.  Not to mention plenty of time to clean, pack my things, and go to the gym without worrying about lessons, classes, or school schedules.  It almost feels like being a kid again, waking up during school breaks without an alarm and deciding what to do with the day.

While I've been enjoying the time off and a lack of stress, I've also been looking ahead.  I just celebrated my 29th birthday on Wednesday (and now I'm 30 in Korea!)  But I'm not worried about it; I neither feel nor look old so that's a plus.  It is weird to think about, however.  A lot has changed since I was 24 and new to Korea.  I've changed a lot.  I've watched a lot of things in Korea change as well.

What does it mean to get older, though?  Is it adding another candle to the birthday cake?  Relishing in signs of age or trying to hide them?  Is it shedding old behaviors/ideas/goals and gathering new ones in their place?  Do we change the people who are a part of our lives or try to change ourselves to fit better with them?  I have tried my best to not change myself for other people, but I have made a few mistakes here and there, and learned from them as much as possible.  These days I've been trying to think about what I need to do for myself, to make myself happy instead of trying to make everyone else happy first.  A friend of mine recently remarked that I had spent so much time accommodating everyone's needs that I forgot about my own.  So this year, the last year of my twenties, I made a pledge to myself that I would take more time to focus on "me" things: goals, happiness, inspiration, creativity, emotional & physical health, and knowledge.

Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.  
- Lucille Ball

I had my three and four month post-surgery check-ups recently.  Everything is still going well with the healing; my eyes are clear and there are no problems.  The dryness is getting better as time goes on and winter starts to wind to a close, so my eyes are getting clearer.  My next (and last) check-up is at the end of next month before I go home.  Can't believe that it's been over four months already since I had surgery, and less than two months until home, but the past few months have passed quickly thanks to reduced teaching time at school and vacation.  I'll head back to school for a week next week, then onto a few weeks of spring vacation before the new school year.  Right now my current (slight) irritation is working out flight details, and trying to find a compromise with my school.  Crossing my fingers that it will work out in the end!

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